First Day

First day of school today! I guess I am as ready as I will ever be. Tina has her clothes picked out, book bag ready and everything seems to be in order. Mommy just has to get ready emotionally. Everyone who doesnt have school aged kids dont think its a big deal, until you are there you have no idea. School is a big deal, it shapes them after they are done for the rest of their lives. I am really not ready for all of this, but I know that its for her own good. Its good that I get to stay for the first 75 minutes or so. I know it wont be for her but for me.

After school today Foxy comes home. We are so excited. I have to work til 11 but I know my team will do a good job without me.

I took Tina to school and it was hard to leave. I am ok though only cried a little.

Yesterday

Yesterday was a pretty boring day, I got my new liences made, and I applied for a new soc sec card. Then by the time I got home I had to get ready for work. I went to work. I came home seen my husband for like 10 minutes and fell asleep playing with his hair. I have to cancel my appoint for my obgyn today because I dont have insurance yet. The insurance company said my insurance will be back dated from the time we were married. Randy is going to be able to cover Tina which will be great. Jeffs insurance sucks and they want me to jump through fire to cover her. She cant even go to Dr. Davis. Today I am going to shampoo carpets because my worst fear has came true the dog is stinking up my house. I am going to get that baking soda laundry detergant it works well with ordors and stains

Married finally

The wedding was nice and entertaining. We did not have a rehearsal so it was crazy. We could not find the music on the cd so the wrong song played at first. Christina and Luke did not wait for best man and maid of honor to go to the end. I cried while saying my vows and to stop crying I laughted. It was a really emotional day. But the goal was achieved we are finally married and we are a family. I love him so much, and when he said his vows to me I know he meant it and I know it will never change. So overall we got what we wanted, Married and our friends and family were there and thats all that counts. I will have pictures posted as soon as I get them.

I am so sore

My body has had it! I think this time around I have really done myself in. I am so tired and sore I can barely walk. I dont know how I am getting married tomorrow. I mean its not just my legs like before its my whole damn body. I have never been so sore. I dont remember feeling this way with Tina and I went to school and carried a book bag all day. I guess I just cant have kids easily. First I loose 20 pounds, then I ache all over when I start gaining weight. I am so cranky too I can feel myself being irriable. I dont want to be that way. I guess I should just cry and get it over with.

A few days left

I only have a few days before my wedding. I am so excited that I want to cry. Pregnancy hormones again lol. I tried on my dress and I look so fat! The pictures are going to look terrible. I guess its a story to tell Ava, I was 7 months pregnant when I married her father. I havent seen Randy in a few days atleast it feels like it. Its hard to have a relationship on different shifts sometimes. I really hope people dont talk about how fat I am. My white dress really shows my pregnancy. I hope people think that I look pretty atleast even if I am fat. Randys friend Lewis is coming I am so glad I got ahold of him for Randy. I really want all his friends to be there. I dont have many friends so I wont really have any besides the new friend I recently made. I am really looking foreward to having a friend. I really think that we are going to become good friends because from what I know of her we are alot alike. She seems to love kids like I do. She is a good mom and she seems very devoted to her husband. Funny how people can fog how you see people and then when you take a look for yourself you discover that you wasted alot of time thinking bad things instead of having a good friend. Life is too short for that kind of crap. I hope sometime we can go out to lunch alone without the men. I think that would be nice. Well I am nervous about the wedding. I am going to cry probably the whole time. I really dont care either, for once I am finally going to be happy and I think I deserve that.

too fat for pants

I can no longer fit into my pants! I am not sure if thats a good thing or not lol. People are finally saying that I am looking pregnant. I even was told that I look cute!

Wedding

September 23 @4:00 Randy and I are going to get married. The thought of it makes me want to cry. I love him with all my heart and I really cant wait to be his wife. We have been through alot together. He has been there for me when I thought that I was going to lose the baby. Its going to be a small wedding, just family and close friends. Randys friend Lewis is going to be home so he is going to be the best man. My sister is going to be my maid of honor. I am really excited. I think I am finally getting what I deserve, a good life with a good man that loves me and my babies. Thats all I ever wanted. The wedding is going to be informal. I am just going barefooted in a white materity summer dress. Well I will keep you updated on the wedding plans as I know them.

Last night was fun. I took my clients to the parade and I got to be in it too. I am so glad I did not have to walk because lately my feet have been killing me. I got one of those foot spa things hoping to help my aching feet. To be honest, I think my body has had it with this pregnancy. It has taken one hell of a beating. Guess what I have three months to go. I am tough though.

Divorce finally

I am offically a free women. My divorce was finally granted. I am so glad. I was so nervous. I have never been to court before and my stomache was all in knots and I was worried that my pregnancy would stop the divorce. After being asked by my lawyer if the papers I signed are correct and I still agree to the terms and Jeff agreeing to, we were divorced in five minutes. Afterwards, Jeff and I went to Dennys to talk about his upcoming deployment. I guess he is leaving next week for Iraq. He had to give me his orders and we had to talk about Tina. My mom was kind of upset that I went but Randy is not a jealous guy and he has nothing to worry about my relationship with Jeff is a friendship that I have to have because of my daughter. Exs dont have to fight over their kids. It seems to be a trend in my family. Well I just wanted to share my joy. Hopefully I will be Randys wife Sept 23rd. I know thats soon after my divorce but when you love someone you dont want to waste time. I know things will work out for me this time. Randy and I have something most people cant touch.