Really horrible day

I had a very horrible day. It all started in bed at 6 am in the morning. Once again as usual my husband did not seen interested in sex. All I wanted was to be touched and showed some type of affection after a long week. He just complained of his nose and let me touch him. I get the feeling sometimes that this relationship is not 50/50 in the bedroom. He seems to miss the mark when it comes to knowing what I need. Every time I have tried to bring it up he gets upset so I avoid it now. I am not sure what to do with that situation.

Then, I had to watch my niece. She and my son decided naps were not on the schedule for them. I was cranky and so was my middle child Ava. She did not want to clean her room and wanted to argue about every fucking thing. I just wanted to put her in the car and drop her off at Grandmas! By the time I took my niece home the day was ruined. Everyone was cranky and my husband would barely speak to me.

It does not end there. We went to the store and looked at paint colors and then went to get some food from Aldis. When we got home my computer was broken. My lap top screen was shattered. I was in tears and I wanted to yell but I kept it in and tole my older daughter it was an accident. 74 dollars is the cost of replacement and I need it next week!

After all the dumb shit happened, I decided to eat and then exercise. I feel better now sitting her typing about how fucked up my day is. I however, am worried what is next for my crazy ass evening. I am not sure I want to spend anytime with my husband, to tell you the truth I have been a little disappointed in our relationship and how things are going. I am not sure what happened since we went on a date. Maybe it's my pmdd talking. I hope so.

On a different note, I am back on the weight loss train. You know my diet that I hope to stick to. I know you have heard it before. This time I plan to stick with it. I feel ugly and unattractive. Not to mention I need something to do besides school for me.

Well I am going to attempt to turn this fucking frown upside down. I am not guaranteeing anything!